Saturday, January 14, 2006

Non-relief aid

Poor Mercy. Her festive spirit was significantly dampened when flying back into Dubai after her holiday recently. She was detained at Customs for trying to import a rabbit (not of the pet animal kind, but a member of the Sex and the City species). Luckily, shame and embarrassment no longer form part of her vocabulary - "it would have been a whole lot worse if I had been travelling with my family," she points out.

Apparently, the Dubai customs men were nice and polite, asking her first if she had "anything rubber" in her case, before spelling it out in single syllables when her jetlag-fuddled mind failed to get the drift. "They took me into a private room and asked me if I would unpack the offending item, which was luckily sealed, unused and wrapped, therefore not likely to whizz and jump around the floor.

"When I handed it over, they did ask me if I was sure I didn't have anything else in my case - and did I have any handcuffs with me. By this time, I was able to see the funny side, and responded 'not this time, officer'."

After filling in forms, Mercy was released with no charge (certainly no electrical charge anyway) and rather quaintly, the officers handed her back the unused batteries. Of course, she should have known better, but tried to justify the shenanigans by saying there were no written rules of what she wasn't allowed to bring into the country. "And besides, whoever would have thought nine inches of rubber would show up on an airport x-ray machine?"

12 Comments:

Blogger secretdubai said...

Quite why marital aids are banned here is anyone's guess.

1:41 AM  
Anonymous pamela said...

I was wondering...
What if you were to duct tape about 8 of them together into a bundle, they would look like something else less obvious and possibly get through.

( forget it..just got visual image in my head. Bundle of dynamite probably isn't better).

2:44 AM  
Blogger CG said...

I am surprised that they really do ban people from bringing in their own 'aids' into the country. I hardly think they need to fear a black market will grow with these items. The customs do really search for these items more than anything else. And they also love the embarrassment caused. One guy who does this job told me that the general consensus is that these items are seen as worse than prostitution, like women are so perverted they prefer them to men. Maybe these guys are made to feel inferior when they find a 9"-er in her baggage....then they put their hands in their pockets only to be reminded of what a 4"-er feels like...uh oh

9:36 PM  
Blogger nzm said...

So what you're really saying CG, is that the Customs Officers' large egos are really extensions of their small p*nises?

:-)
nzm

2:19 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

"Quite why marital aids are banned here is anyone's guess."

Quite why they are called marital aids is anyones guess.

10:11 AM  
Blogger CG said...

nzm
you know what they say...men who drive big cars...loud stereos...etc etc


anon
you need to diversify

1:43 PM  
Blogger desertblog said...

Poor Mercy.

3:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

give me mercy's number.. maybe she coul use my 'help'

12:35 PM  
Blogger desertblog said...

Your help might be too small for her, anonymous.

12:18 AM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

desertblog

At least anon is willing to lend a helping ...errr..hand. you can't fault him for that !

:)

2:56 PM  
Anonymous Yoda said...

All strikingly similar to my Black Prince episode a coupe of years back save for the lack of a private room ... The BP was for a female friend much to the discomfort of her husband! The giggling from the customs men as they paraded me and the BP back through baggage claim was "amusing" and not overshadowed by the large cupboard of similar aids that the BP was placed in while I signed 5 pages of closely typed Arabic to get my passport back and freedom from the airport. The friend (now divorced) showed suitable concern and gratitude at my efforts

6:54 PM  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

That is strange why would they stop that and turn a blind eye to prostitution? Because it serves men? Makes money?

10:10 PM  

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